A little backstory:

At my previous visit with my doctor, I had pointed out a lump that I had found in my breast. He told me that it was Fibrocystic Breast Disease and that I had nothing to worry about. He said that if the cyst grew, that would mean that it was filling up with fluid, which he could easily drain in the office. Because of this benign diagnoses, I didn’t feel a sense of urgency as the lump grew in my breast between appointments. It wasn’t until I developed a constant, dry, hacking cough that I began to worry…or should I say, my husband began to worry.

My cough was so bad that I could barely talk on the telephone. I thought that my cough was allergy / asthma induced, so I made an appointment with my doctor a few months early to take care of the cyst in my breast and to get an inhaler for my cough.

During my exam, I reclined on the table and lifted my arm over my head as the doctor requested.  I knew something was wrong by the look on his face. He led me to another room where he had an ultra-sound machine set up for pelvic exams. He then reached for a prescription pad and ordered me to get a mammogram at a nearby radiologist’s office. I was shocked by how easy it was for him to do that. If all he had to do was write my name at the top of a pre-printed prescription pad, why hadn’t he done that the year before?

You see, the year before, like many young women, I was not offered a mammogram, ultrasound, biopsy- nothing. This was a terrible mistake on the part of my doctor, but again, all too common in younger women.

Check out this article. It explains that misdiagnosis or delayed diagnosis of breast cancer is the most common medical malpractice suit. Now, before I get any hate mail: I am not condoning or condemning the suing of doctors. I love doctors. I am simply posting this for everyone’s best interest. I would hope any doctor reading this would download the article, read it, and pass it on to a colleague. It could save a life.  Take all lumps seriously doctors; follow them closely or stick a needle in it! Please! (and thank you)

I just hope the technician’s hands are warm.

What am I, an amateur? Of course I know to have it open in the front!

I wasn’t disappointed. Her hands were warm. The technician guided me into the room and was very sweet and talkative. I didn’t catch her name, which is a shame since I like to be able to recall the names of all the people who grope me. Grope me? More like mauled me. She and that dreadful machine.

Ms. Warm Hands had me stand before the machine while she prepared the film and made some adjustments. Then I gracefully unveiled my offending orb and placed her delicately on the shelf of the x-ray machine. Ms. Warm hands pushed me further into the machine (hey! No rough housing!) and then placed her hand on my boob to hold it in place while she mercilessly lowered the top panel. Then she gave it a few sadistic hand cranks for good measure and told me to “hold still”. Where else was I going to go? She had my tit trapped in a vise grip. I felt as helpless as an animal caught in a trap, although chewing it off wasn’t an option at that point.

After I was finished with the mammogram machine, I was guided into another room to have a proper ultrasound performed. A new technician squirted some lubricant on my breast and began to move the wand back and forth. It kind of tickled.

When that was done, I wiped the excess goo off of my chest and stepped back into my nice clothes. What a waste of a good outfit.

That’s reassuring.

I’ll avoid Michael if I can.

I arrived on time and was shuttled into a room where there was a padded table for me to lay on next to an ultra-sound machine. I was told to undress and put a gown on. Then, I laid on the table and waited for the doctor and nurse to come in.

First the doctor numbed my breast in several places with an injectable local anesthetic. Then she showed me the device that she would use to collect the tissue sample of the mass in my breast. It looked like a small gun-like device with a long hollow needle inside the “barrel”. It kind of reminded me of the type of “guns” used to pierce ears, except the needle on this gun was pretty long. She explained that she was going to shoot the needle six times in my breast at different angles to get six different samples. The ultra-sound was used to help her with the placement of the gun against my breast. All together, the process took about 20 minutes. When she was done, she placed a couple of butterfly shaped bandaids over the points of entry. She collected the samples and prepped them to be sent off to a pathology lab to be analyzed.

Meanwhile, my husband has been parked in front of his computer Googling ”Invasive Ductal Carcinoma”.  He tends to overreact when it comes to health issues- while I’m quite the opposite.  I’m certain that everything will be fine; there’s no sense getting upset at this point.